I was listening to my collection of Christmas mp3 songs when I remembered something about a current album I am listening. When I was a kid, we used to have that Christmas album and I used to play it repeatedly during Christmas Eve. Our family was still complete that time, my Dad was still alive that time and the two of them are still together - not broken. I remembered a scene where my Dad and Mom were both busy preparing food while me and my little sister are both watching outside the window for passing playmates and giving coins to the singing carolers.
It brings mixed emotions to my heart remembering those times, happiness and sadness. How I wish I could bring back those times, I hope someone will invent a time machine and let me travel to that time, I will surely hug both of them at the same time. I wan't to remember the feeling of clinging to both of them at the same time. I'm glad my Mom is still with us. My father died 3 years ago, murdered by stabbing to death by drug induced criminals who are still on the loose. He wasn't a great person or even a role-model father but he loved us and we loved him and that is the most important thing.
I remembered crawling on to my bed whenever I hear something moving beside my Christmas stocking that I hanged near our Christmas tree to check out what Santa Claus look like. In my years of childhood, I never saw Santa even though I knew it was only my Dad. My Dad would always told us to write our wishes on a piece of paper stuffed inside the stockings. I can't recall what wishes I wrote their but I do remember not getting what I wanted hehe! but I always enjoyed the feeling of seeing my stocking filled with gifts. It was fun.
We never had a Christmas Tradition in our family. We only woke-up at around 12am to greet each other and to eat Noche Buena that Mom and Dad prepared and after that we lit up some Roman Candles and lusis (sparklers) and after we finish our stock we'll just watch our neighbors' fireworks while me and my sister crept on our Dad's bosom. Mom never liked dirty kitchen, that's why she makes sure everything is clean while we are outside and before we go back to sleep everything is done already. Actually, when I think about it, we do have Christmas traditions and that counts big time already.
As a child, I liked Christmas because of the gifts that I received from my Mom, Dad and my Ninongs and Ninangs (Godfather and Godmother), Aunts, Uncles, etc... Now as an adult, remembering those times made me realize that it was all about the Family and not the gifts. You may not remember the gifts you received but the memories will remain in your heart. It's the greatest blessing anyone could ever have.
Christmas was always my favorite time of the year, and even up to now. I know not everyone can joyously celebrate Christmas this year after the tragedies that we have encountered this year. I believe that happiness in celebrating Christmas is something to share to others. Happiness when shared brings more happiness. Blessings when shared unto others will bring more blessings to you from above.
I pray that this coming Christmas, I can be a blessing even to a single soul.